Harry Potter and Blah
by Em MKS
Summary: Its funny and it has the F word in it!!
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1  
***************  
*characters belong to J.K. Rowling THE ALL AND MIGHTY  
WRITER!!*  
  
Harry was staying at the Burrow for another-  
  
Harry: How come I always have to go to Ron's?? How  
come I ever get to go 2 Hermione's or Neville's?!?  
  
Me: Because I write the story your a character that  
belongs to J.K. Rowling and I'm writing about you to  
entertain the people who are reading this and I write  
good Fics!  
  
Ron: But the one you were going to put on the site before,  
THAT WAS JUST WRONG!!  
  
Harry: Well I accutally liked the Cho and Me thing....  
  
Ron: O shut-up, can't you see shes trying to turn us into  
some puppets of hers and mock us!  
  
Me: No I'm not! Listen there's pelnty of people out there  
who's wrote about you to! So stop complaining! I mean  
there's one called Iron Wizard where Harry gets poison and  
another one where you two fight about Hermione choosing your  
answer! In this one you can kick Malfoy's ass and say the  
F word!  
  
Ron: Cool  
  
-Hermione walks in carrying a book-  
  
Hermione: Hey you guys what's all the comotion and why is it  
all white??  
  
Harry: Because this...'writer' Em MKS is trying to turn us  
into her little puppets!  
  
Hermione: Well, it is her story......Em MKS??  
  
Me: Ya Hermione?  
  
Hermione: Can we say the F word and kick peoples butts and can  
you make me less proper?  
  
Me: Sure, but the less proper thing would make it like Tomb  
Raider or something!  
  
-Ron looks puzzled-  
  
-I sigh-  
  
Me: Tomb Raider is a movie where this girl named Laura Croft  
kicks peoples ass'.  
  
Ron: O....soooo can you make it a mixture?  
  
Harry: Can you make it like the Spice Girls movie?  
  
Hermione: Please make me less proper!  
  
Me: Ok Hermione gets to be less proper, No spice girl movie  
junk and they went out ages ago, and the mixture thing is so  
Scary Movie! I mean Scary Movie 2 only barely just made it   
into theaters! So I write the Fic not you me got it? Good.  
SO ANYWAYS!!  
  
-Harry and Ron rush back to there positions-  
  
Me: Ugh I gotta start a new chapter now!  
  
**Next chapter we START THE ACCUTAL STORY! But we couldn't this  
chapter because 3 people who remain annoymus HARRY RON AND HERMIONE**  



	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
So as I was saying in the 1st chapter!  
Harry was staying at THE BURROW once again  
this summer and Harry had met a muggle girl  
on his visit.....  
  
Harry: Hi, my name is Harry Potter what's yours  
  
Girl: My name is Laura Croft-  
  
Harry: HEY EM MKS WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH DAT  
LAURA CROFT I THOUGHT YOU SAID THE MIXING WAS  
SO SCARY MOVIE!!  
  
Me: Hey, you wanna know the girl or not! Take  
it from My name!  
  
Girl: My name is Laura Croft, nice to meet you.  
  
Harry: So, what school do you go to?  
  
Laura: Uhhhh......East Middle School, it's a  
school for girls and you sleep there and stuff.  
Which school do you go to?  
  
Harry: Umm.....West Middle School, it's like yours  
but for boys. WHO WROTE THIS SCRIPT ITS STUPID!!!  
  
Me: Shut up I'm thinking as I go along! From  
Umm west middle school!  
  
Harry: Umm.....West Middle School, it's like yours  
but for boys.  
  
Laura: Cool....you wanna go to Lunch with me?  
  
Harry: Sure.  
  
-Laura and Harry walk to McDonalds-  
  
Harry: ALRIGHT WHAT'S WITH THE MCDONALDS!!  
  
Me: HEY! McDonalds is international so shut up  
and follow the script! From sure!  
  
Harry: Sure.  
  
-Laura and Harry walk to McDonalds-  
  
Laura: I'll have 9 piece Chicken Nuggets with an  
Oreo McFlurry.  
  
Harry: Uh, ya I'll have the same.  
  
Harry didn't have McDonalds before because the Dursleys  
never let him have McDonalds.  
  
Me: Don't say a word thats not in the script!  
  
Harry: Listen can I confese something, it'll explain the  
explanations after word.....  
  
Laura: Sure.......  
  
Harry: I'm......I'm....I'm.....god this is a lot harder than  
it seems..............I'm....I'm a......  
  
Laura: Your a....  
  
Harry: -quickly- I'mawizard.  
  
Laura: I didn't catch that.  
  
Harry: I'm a wizard....  
  
Laura: REALLY!?!?  
  
Harry: Ya...you probaly don't wanna hangout with me anymore  
  
Laura: Of course I do! I'm a witch! I go to Beauxingtons!  
  
Harry: Really! That's so cool! I accutally go to Hogwarts!  
I'm seeker on the Gryffindor Quidditch team and I'm the  
Triwizard Tournament champion.....but Cedric still should've  
won....  
  
Laura: I thought I had heard that name before. Fluer Delacour  
told me about your flying it sounded amazing!  
  
Harry: Really?  
  
Laura: Ya, and how you saved her little sister Gabreil, amazing  
I wish I could've been there, but I wasn't in the age rage to go  
so, I never got to go and my parents would never let me....  
  
Harry: Wow!  
  
-Ron, Fred, George, Bill, Charlie, and Ginny come walking in-  
  
Ron: THERE YOU ARE HARRY!  
  
Fred: We've been looking all over for you!  
  
George: Ya, come on lets go play-  
  
-George just noticed Laura-  
  
George: well, you know what I mean......  
  
Bill: Come on Harry!  
  
Charlie: Wait! He hasn't finished his fries yet.  
  
-Ginny sat next to Laura-  
  
Ginny: -shakes Laura's hand- Hey, I'm Ginny Weasly, a friend of  
Harry's. What's your name?  
  
Laura: I'm Laura Croft, are you daughter of Athur Weasly? The  
guy that works in the department of the misuse of muggle artifacts?  
  
Ginny: Your a witch?!  
  
Laura: Ya, course I am! I'm new in the neighborhood and I saw your  
house and I thought "Magic must be holding it up" and I saw a red head  
kid in the window with another girl....  
  
Charlie: Yup, that's Percy and Penelope Clearwater, his girl friend.  
  
-Ginny giggled-  
  
Harry: Laura goes to Beauxingtons.  
  
Charlie: Really? You wanna come to our house?  
  
Laura: Sure, you better inform your mom or dad first so your mom isn't  
panicing.  
  
Ron: Good idea, i'll call her and-  
  
Harry: I'll call her, what's your phone number?  
  
Ron: 342-1234  
  
Harry: K -dials number-  
  
(Hello?)  
  
Harry: Hi Mrs Weasly, it's Harry.  
  
(O hello harry dear)  
  
Harry: Listen can we bring our new friend Laura over, she's (looks  
around) our kind.  
  
(Of course Harry dear. And would you please bring me a cheeseburger  
I haven't had one of those in ages)  
  
Harry: Sure, bye Mrs. Weasly!  
  
(Bye dear)  
  
Harry: -Hangs up- ok first we need to get a cheeseburger.  
  
Bill: Why?  
  
Harry: Well, your mum said she hadn't had one in ages.  
  
Bill: o0o  
  
-Everyone giggles-  
  
They got the cheeseburger for Mrs. Weasly, and headed off to The  
Burrow.  
  
**Next chapter, what will Laura think and do?** 


End file.
